But Don’t Touch ~ An Erasure Poem

Albany Nights

Albany Nights (Photo credit: HckySo)

I lived in one of the tenements,
so loud and confused, the neighborhood
stretched out, scared, skinny,
squinting payback when I creaked open the door.
I just sit in the back now
and we never talk much of today.

I discovered the dark outside,
its hands covering another lie
when I closed my eyes.

I chase all its changing,
kicked in the gut, blood on my chin.
How could I go back?
I closed myself from me.
The feeling of eyes leaning against the inner door,
it’s my way now. A one-way street. Alone

I didn’t feel anything.

This is a first attempt at an Erasure Poem, as prompted by my friend Anna Montgomery over at dVerse Poets Pub. It has been concocted from snippets of my own (somewhat gritty) short story, But Don’t Touch.

Advertisements

25 thoughts on “But Don’t Touch ~ An Erasure Poem

  1. Emotionally potent, and as you wrote the source, there was clearly a mind melding with the original author that gives it a heft that is really appealing. Impressive and intriguing verse. Thanks so much for joining us today!

  2. I enjoyed that — and cool to see it is from your own work.
    I use to live in Albany, New York for 2 years — loved skating in the big plaza downtown near the government buildings: ? South Mall near that big egg building.
    Thanx for the memories.
    But I did not see the hopelessness as clearly as your poem illustrates. I lived right on Washington Park and saw some of the night life.

  3. The use of your own short story fascinated me, and I had to reread the piece in an effort to visualize the lengthier source. This is potent and condensed, all all good poetry should be. Perhaps that tale was evolving into this, it’s clearest form.

  4. I just love this.

    I tried one erasure poem so far, and it was exhilarating to do. I did mine from something I tore out of the newspaper. I loved doing it but I felt the result of my first try was very awkward.

    I have some short stories I toyed with when my blog was new. I should see if one of them could be honed into a poem. If you don’t mind me borrowing the idea ^_^

  5. Pingback: Welcome Spring | In My Parlor

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s